Monday, September 29, 2014

The Unseen

Last night I was by City Hall Park, having just exited at the Brooklyn Bridge subway stop. I was meeting my brother for dinner downtown and was calling the restaurant to adjust the reservation when out of the corner of my eye, I saw an NYPD Officer standing by the entrance to the park.
A few feet away from him was an obvious EDP (Emotionally Disturbed Person) who was rambling on and on and on about something that sounded like a conspiracy theory. This woman was disheveled and crazed, standing in front of the Officer and perhaps blocking his view.
Here's what I observed: an NYPD Officer not encouraging her, but acknowledging her, ever so slightly. He was not being rude, he didn't insist that she move along, he was simply tolerating this woman who obviously felt that he was positioned there purposely to be her sounding board. I saw him trying to look past her as well and keep his eyes open for whatever might be going on around him.
I took this all in quickly, then kept it moving over to the restaurant. But here's what occurred to me on the way there: this is the unseen thing that NYPD Officers do on any given day...the thing that the News Media will never report about...the moment that you will never see someone re-tweet.
Truth is, I find it sad. How many times has an Officer like that one had to simply be courteous, use professionalism and respect with someone who will never acknowledge it? Where are the cameras when CPR is deployed in the field?
Some say God's eyes are enough. I don't disagree.
I would just like someone to see the unseen.

Tuesday, September 23, 2014


The word probability is defined as a strong likelihood or chance of something.
It was the first word to cross my mind when I first heard about the NYPD Officer who was killed on Sunday. 
I can hear your minds spinning double-time: an NYPD Officer was shot?
How did I miss that?
The truth is that this Officer was not shot, but killed in a van accident going to a routine detail. He was ejected from the van when it hit a hard corner on the Bruckner Expressway. Two other officers were injured, and the rest of the occupants of the van were treated and released from various Bronx hospitals. 
I'm quite sure it is completely devastating for the friends and family of this Officer, regardless of the cause of death. 
What the majority of the general public does not understand about police work is that the probability of you getting hurt or worse is greater simply by being out there more.
You don't have to necessarily be chasing a perp in order to qualify as someone who is putting their life in danger; the statistics are not in your favor even when you are doing a routine detail. If you're on shift, you're in a car, you're wearing a uniform, you're exposed, and you interact with more people.
That pushes the probability of something happening to you up, every single day that you're on shift.
And that, dear friends, is why the Cop's Wives and Others that stay home and worry have every right to do so. The probability of your loved one getting hurt or worse is always there, unless and until he's home in bed, laying right next to you.
Then and only then do you breathe.

Rest In Peace, Officer Williams. 
If you'd like to read more, click here:

Thursday, September 11, 2014

Once Again

Once again, I am sad and proud and overwhelmed...this day again, this infamous date, has come around...thirteen times now...and it doesn't seem real, still...I see these Towers in my mind's eye...and I miss that Skyline...the way it was, the way we were...the New York City that I grew up with...I am once again reminded of all that we have lost, and grateful for all that I have.
Thank you NYPD...I remember seeing cops in the streets that day and my heart bled for them...thanks also to FDNY, and all the other First Responders that gave so much that fateful day.
I for one will #Never #Forget.

Tuesday, September 2, 2014

So much to Say...

I find lately that there's so much to say and too little time to say it in. I'm running from work to home, the babysitter...a friend's place, the store...and my thoughts come along, fast and furious, and yet I am generally so busy that I can't find a home for them all before the day is done.
Today, a whole bunch of kids went back to school around America. I have thoughts about this, and the pools closing, and the sun setting earlier in the day. I'm not positive that anyone would want to hear my thoughts, but I think them anyway, and I dream in vivid technicolor at night.
I am still a huge advocate for cops everywhere, but sometimes an event happens, and I don't have time to comment about it until the moment has passed.
Sometimes I find I can't say anything. Next Thursday the anniversary will come along again, and I will find myself full of emotion, but the words may or may not hit the page.
Know that I am with you, my fellow Police Wives, whether or not I am posting as much as I once did.
I am still here, in passionate as always. Sometimes real life gets in the way of my very best intentions, as it does for us all.

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