Wednesday, March 28, 2012

A Favor for a Friend

I was speaking to a friend on the phone yesterday, and she was in turmoil over a situation that had happened just last week with her husband. She asked me to comment about it on my blog, and I said I would.

It goes a little something like this:

On Thursday morning at 4:20am my husband was pulled over on the Parkway. He was wasted. I knew he was wasted because at 3am he called me and he could barely speak. I begged him to not drive the car, to please stay at a hotel, as he was at least 45 minutes away from where we live. He called me a drama queen and did what he does often, got into his car to come home.
He made it quite far from where he was and was almost home without incident. He was pulled over on the Parkway. The officer had him do a Breathalyzer and he blew a .12.
(In New York anyway, that's well over the limit)
Instead of arresting him they impounded his car and got him a cab. The officer gave him a handful of tickets.
I wish they arrested him. This is not the first time he has driven drunk. He makes bad choices all the time, believes he is never as drunk as he is and drives all the time. If the officer had arrested him he would have been forced into a program, his license would be taken away and he would no longer be a menace to the road.
I know that this officer thinks he was doing my husband a favor but the reality is that no lesson has been learned from this. I'm asking all of the LEOs that read this to not let anyone go who is caught drunk. It probably isn't the first time they have driven this way and by getting off they really learn no lesson. They will do it again and next time the person driving may not be so lucky.
Many people could have been hurt that evening, if my husband had hit someone or killed someone the lives of the families would be changed forever. If my own husband killed himself my life will be changed forever. He has a problem and he will not admit it. Now by being let go, yet again...he will most likely do it again.
This is a very big issue, drinking and driving...please remember that those you pull over have done it before. They need to be arrested every time.
Thanks Stella for letting me tell my story. If one more person gets arrested and not let go then I have achieved what I set out to do...

My heart broke for my friend. I've met her husband and I like him, he's a charming guy with a great sense of humor. He probably charmed his way right out of a DWI. I know he has a pretty high tolerance for alcohol; he probably did not feel drunk or unable to drive. That's the big problem; it's the nature of being don't feel impaired, and therefore reason takes a flying leap right out the window.

To read a great story written by a cop about this same issue, log on to:


  1. We have a similiar problem here in my state. Except for with a different twist. The police do everything right and arrest but the judges let them off with a slap on the hand. So please Judges make note of this as well! Just the other day on the news someone was arrested for his 8th DUI! Thank you for sharing this story and bringing attention to a big national problem.

  2. Ah, we have those judges in NYC as well...
    !! Stella

  3. There are times we don't make the arrest because, while we believe the person is intoxicated, for various reasons we may realize it can't hold up in court. I once had a woman I believed was driving intoxicated, but her left leg was in a cast. Field sobriety testing was out. But I can say this. At the point someone is taking a breath test, they should already be under arrest for DUI. Offering a breath test (other than PBT) under any other circumstance is a law enforcement agency asking for trouble. Obviously I take DUI's very seriously. And thanks for the plug.

  4. SC: You're welcome. It was a well-written article. And...hoo boy, I am feeling for my friend...and the entire situation.
    :) Stella


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