Thursday, July 6, 2017

Mourning

There's so much to say.
So much to convey.
Today:
I was asked if my husband knew her.
Does it matter?
Yes, in ways large and small, he knew her quite well.
She was like he; believing in a we...that was shattered once again.
How many times had he protected that same little piece of the Big Apple Pie?
We are shaken.
We are sad, and mad, and I am still processing all of my emotions. I have been going about my day as a normal person with normal-people problems: my A/C busted, running from here to there, simply trying to fit it all in without breaking too much of a sweat.
Except I'm running my brain on two separate reels: one playing the minute details of my day, the other a track that cannot stop thinking about the loss we suffered as a Blue Family. That same reel cannot stop tweeting the rotten NYC mayor.
There is no rhyme or reason; I know this, and yet I will not stop playing that same tape over and over in my head, at least not in this moment.
In this moment, I will pray.
Rest in Peace Officer Miosotis Familia. You deserved better.

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