Friday, December 28, 2012

Letting Go Of Christmas

It's hard for me. I know a lot of other people who could care less. Hell, I know people who already took their tree down and their outside lights are being ripped down too. There's a very small part of me that wishes I could be that way; that it would be easier for me to let go of Christmas.
Starting with the decorations: it's a tradition in my family to leave everything up until January 6th, no matter what. January 6th is a lesser-known Holiday known as the Feast of the Epiphany, which we would sometimes celebrate growing up. Either way, it stuck, and nothing gets put away until the 6th. Always.
But it's more than that; I know it in my heart of hearts, although I am unable to articulate the fullness of it, the breadth and the scope...the energy of the season. I am loathe to let it go; I like the way my heart stirs when I hear a particular Christmas song or how I am somehow compelled to do something nice for someone...just because. I want to surprise people; I am dripping in kindness, and feel love towards my fellow man. There's something about letting go of that that is crushing to my Spirit.
I asked my husband yesterday: so do you think it's easier for people living in warmer climates? Maybe part of my reluctance of moving on from Christmas is that New York City is somewhat dreary in January; it's cold and the wind tunnels down the streets like nothing you've ever seen. We hunker down here and the whole world seems desolate. Perhaps it's easier to let go of Christmas when you can golf outside a week later.
Who knows? Maybe I'm the only one who feels this way. Each year I pray that the Spirit of Christmas will live in me throughout the year...and sometimes it does. It's just a door that has to close, otherwise the next time we open it, it wouldn't be as special. I get that, but it doesn't make it any easier to take down the tree.

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