Tuesday, July 16, 2013

The End Result

I was out walking the dog, debating on whether or not to call the Doc. It was a Friday and I really wanted to hear the test results if she had them, and not torture myself throughout the weekend, waiting to hear until Monday.
So I called.
Once the Doc got on the phone, she seemed very happy to talk to me. "I was just going to call you!"
"Well...I got your test results back and they were very good...off the charts, really!" She went on. "I'm going to explain how this works and then give you all the info." She began explaining how the test results worked, which was pretty much what my friend had already explained to me.
I had stopped walking at that point, and my heart was beating like a wild woman.
"Although I cannot say a zero percent chance of anything, your scores for this were one in ten million, and your score for that was one in 360,000..."
I could still hear her, but I was crying by then, and a flash of heat started traveling up and down my spine at lightning speed. It was exactly what I had asked God for...not that I deserved it. But it was what I needed to hear. I suddenly felt as if I had a very real excuse wiped right off the table: could I now justify terminating a pregnancy that was not only viable, but probably perfectly healthy?
I still wasn't sure. I just knew that I was one answer closer.

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