It was one of the most awful weeks of my life; I was buried in shock, grief, and misery. It was a week I won't soon forget, and one I wish I could.
This week one year ago, I lost my Beloved Grandmother to a prolonged battle with Alzheimer's. I spent the week much the same way; at a wake and a funeral, and then indulging in vats of comfort food, taking in more than one person could ever need. My Dad and brother were steeped in the first-year anniversary blues, and there I was, dealing with another staggering loss in my life.
It was another terrible week.
I dreamt of my StepMom last night. She was talking to me, and for some reason, I was the only one who could hear her. I told her how every time I saw sunflowers, I thought of her. I can't recall much else of the conversation, but I know it was good.
I miss her.
I miss my Grandmother, but it in a very different way; she lived a long life, and suffered such a long, protracted illness, that when she finally passed, I was happy to see her go on and be free of this life and its pain.
My Stepmom was in the prime of her life; she died so suddenly, that a part of me still can't believe she's gone. I miss her in ways that I cannot explain.
|Beautiful image by dabi|
So...here I am again. It's this week, and I am not hoping for a three-peat. I'm going to enjoy the Olympics and take care of myself. I promise to check in with you guys a little more than last week. And, of course, I will be advocating for Cop's Wives everywhere. I'm going to try and make it as normal as possible. In fact, I'm rooting for boring.